Detaching Meaning

              One of the problems I have with letting go of things that I have accumulated is that I attach meaning to objects of which I have acquired. I think this is probably the case for most people, although some people have a harder time detaching meaning than others. I use to actually feel like my stuffed animals, dolls, and other toys had real feelings when I was a child. If I had seen Toy Story at the age of eight, I don't think anyone could have ever convinced me that toys are not real and are simply things. What is it with putting a face on something that makes that object come alive? Call me a whack-a-doodle or whatever but I still have to tell myself when I am going through the girls' toys that the stuffed animals and dolls are not real and that their feelings are not being hurt just because I am giving them away. Yes, I know, I'm a nut case :-).

             With other stuff such as clothes and knick-knacks and gadgets around my house, the getting rid of difficulty falls into one of two categories: 1. I could care less about it so good riddance and 2. I care too much about it, but it needs to go so I have to just force myself to let go. The second category happens with things like baby clothes that I get sentimental over or souvenirs in which I attach entire past trip memories to, or the girls' school work in which I want to hold on to every last mis-formed letter that they produce on paper. When I attach some sort of meaning to an object, it almost becomes a part of my identity. Attaching meaning to things is not necessarily a bad thing. Objects can be meaningful and help to tell the story of the human race from ancient history to modern man. It is when too many objects are given meaning that a problem arises as those objects start to encroach upon and weigh down a person's life.

             Detaching meaning from objects can be a very time consuming and painful task. I feel that over the years, I have gotten better at letting go of things in my house and giving them away to our local Community Chest or the Junior League for Bag-A-Bargain. Sometimes I have an occasional regret of an object that I gave away, but most of the time, I could not even begin to tell you what I actually did give away. That is when I know for certain that purging my home of those things was the exact right thing to do. The other problem I encounter is managing the admittance of new objects into my house and making sure I do not repeat a pattern of excess.

Two Christmases ago, my right hand was in a cast and I couldn't decorate our house with all of the stuff that we usually decorate with. I used fresh greens, and holly from my yard that year and brought out only the "essentials," tree ornaments, tree skirt, and stockings from our hoards of Christmas decor. I even bought  fresh Christmas wreaths for the door and windows and that was it. When it came time to undecorate my house it was done in less than half the morning, whereas in the past it had taken me days to take it all down. Since then, I have added back to the Christmas decor that I take out but I have also given a lot of it away. It's still not the huge amount I use to bring out, but some of it has come back in full force. That's the fine line I walk when it comes to things. What is enough to make it just right not only at Christmas time, but also throughout the entire year.

               Deciding what things are meaningful and useful in your home can be a daily struggle. Sometimes I want to purge it ALL! And sometimes I just want to hold on to it all as if my life depended on it. I realize that my life does NOT depend on the things that I posses and in reality those things may sometimes hinder my authentic life living. So the process continues. And in the recognition that the monitoring of the stuff that comes in and out of my house is indeed a process, I grow somewhat day-by-day, year-by-year in knowing what truly is meaningful to me and to my family.

        As an example of objects that can be meaningful, the photos I have posted today come from a family collection of 1950's World Book Encyclopedias as well as a family collection of old cameras. I asked my mom if I could have these things this year. These objects are meaningful to me because they  represent a piece of our family's history. In finding a spot to showcase my "new" old family treasures, I took down objects that were not meaningful, but rather only served to be a space filler. Those non meaningful objects have since been donated instead of relocated to another part of the house. Although the encyclopedias and cameras are objects with attached meaning, the meaning is important to our family. These objects serve to enhance the story of our family and are things I hope will always be passed down from one generation to the next. Will they consume me with thought and worry? No. That's just it. Well-appointed objects serve a family in meaningful ways and enhance daily life whether they serve to work for you or to chronicle your family's history, or to entertain you, etc. In detaching meaning from the objects in one's home, it is not to say that all things should be devoid of any significance. It is to say, however, that careful consideration should be given to the things that do truly enhance your life in order to create a more peaceful and working environment in which your family can thrive. So what are things that are meaningful to you and your family? How do you manage the things that come and go in your home? Do you have any tips on making detaching meaning from an object easier? I'd love to know!